"Trust your gut" isn't a plan. What sex worker safety organisations actually recommend is a specific, two-part check-in system, agreed with someone else before the appointment — not improvised if something feels wrong.
The Two-Check-In System
Tell a trusted person two things in advance: when you expect to arrive, and when you expect to be done. Check in with them at both points — on arrival, and again when you leave or the appointment ends. If you don't check in at the second point within an agreed window, they know to act. This is the core method used by sex worker safety projects in the UK and elsewhere, not something improvised for this article.
Agree on a Code Word
A single word or phrase, decided in advance, that means "something is wrong, come now or call for help" if said during a check-in call or text — without needing to explain further in the moment. The value is that it works even if you can't speak freely.
Decide the Fallback in Advance, Not in the Moment
Agree beforehand what your contact actually does if you miss a check-in — call you, call the venue, call someone else, or call for help outright. An unclear plan is the same as no plan when it's actually needed.
Report It Afterward
If something did go wrong, telling us afterward helps — both for your own record and to flag a real problem. See our guide on support and reporting for how that actually works.
Frequently Asked Questions
Isn't a check-in system overkill for a routine booking?
It costs nothing and takes under a minute to set up — the entire point is that you decide it before you need it, not after.
What if my contact doesn't hear from me and isn't sure what to do?
That's exactly what agreeing the fallback plan in advance solves — decide together what "act now" actually means before the booking, not during it.